Disappointed

So, yes I'm disappointed & shocked at "the results" from the PET scan. I say "the" because I do not accept it nor do I own it. It is not mine! A couple of days after my surgery, my mom was approached by her coworker & was asked if she & a friend could come to pray for me. So, on Saturday, July 4, I had my very first encounter with God.

As the music played while they prayed, I could feel His presence come upon me...like a down comforter, so warm, so soft, so "comforting." I immediately began to cry when I saw Him, thinking of all the things I have done in my life to disappoint Him. He took me in His arms, like a father does to a baby, & held me, cradled me, stroked my hair, & told me that everything was going to be okay. I stopped crying & saw that he was reaching into my armpit & pulling out this purple ribbon. The purple ribbon was the cancer & He was pulling it out from my body & throwing it up into the sky...the sky then became dark & soon the wind blew & blew it all away. I then saw a brightness that just cannot be explained & he was pouring that brightness into me. Filling me up & overflowing me with His love. I heard singing & looked up & saw that the angels were singing & dancing. They were the most beautiful beings I've ever seen & the songs were heavenly. Then almost like looking into a mirror, He stood in front of me & every breath I took, He took as well. I then looked down & I saw myself, He opened up my brain - which somehow looked like a bookshelf - & started rearranging things. At first I didn't understand what He was doing, but seconds later I heard Cathy ask Him to please help me to understand Him more so that I can continue to do His will & to change my frame of mind to be more like His own. Ahhh, so now I understood! Then, Cathy asked me if Jesus wanted me to go back home & I said yes & as I said that I could feel Him placing me back down gently, like a baby being put down for a nap. I awoke with a smile on my face & a testimony to share. Jesus has promised to heal me from this cancer. He has told me that He has a lot of work for me to do. And that this is only the beginning...that there is much more in store for me. I believe that I am healed, miracles do happen to those who believe, & with Jesus on my side, nothing is impossible. I hope that this entry has touched your heart & that God blesses you as well.